For many people, happiness is the ultimate goal of their existence whereas for some others is considered to be an elusive success. But why it’s so hard for us to get rid of negative thoughts that might keep us back, preventing us from developing further our inner skills?
Through this short article we will attempt to figure out which are the 4 primary bad habits which contribute negatively to our mentality getting us older faster than anything else.
Live according to others’ indications
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”
Bernard M. Baruch, American philanthropist
Parents, friends, colleagues and other favourite or not persons, directly or indirectly, pressure or push you to comply to or follow a specific way of thinking, behaving and making decisions. That does not mean that these people hate you. They just have different expectations for you and try to give advice by indicating you what’s right and what’s wrong. You should take into serious consideration that you are the only one who has the authority to indicate what action you will take in any situation you get involved. If these people really care for you then, they will accept and respect your choices without questioning or dissuading you.
Resist to change
“Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.”
Confucius, Chinese philosopher
Changes occur every day in your ordinary life affecting you in various ways. Changes, for instance in the workplace, are often irrevocable and in case you decide to resist, your life will get tougher and at some point unmanageable. The best possible way to accept smoothly all these changes is to be fearless towards them and stay flexible adapting your life accordingly. Keep in mind that there will be changes that will surprise you; others that will make you feel mixed emotions and a lot more which will have a positive impact on you. It goes without question, be open to changes.
“We can never judge the lives of others, because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation.”
Paulo Coelho, Brazilian novelist
As human beings we have the predisposition to criticize behaviours, situations and people themselves. Nobody is perfect and you know that. It’s worth trying to focus on how to improve your weaknesses as these efforts will distinguish you as a person and personality towards the others. Having that in mind you will stop judging other people’s lives, behaviours or achievements and aim on the goals that really matter for you.
Blame yourself for every personal failure
“The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are.”
Marcus Aurelius, Roman Emperor
Successes and failures are part of our lives. We succeed or fail when we sit for an exam at the school or university, when we submit a project or research to a professor or employer, when we nurture our children and a lot more examples. Do not blame yourself for mistakes you’ve done in the past or failures you’ve been through and not overthink of them because you will probably end up wasting your brain power and energy on underestimating your capabilities and hurting yourself.