Oh My God, I am turning into my mother!

By Mallory Hickethier

At 24 years old, I never would have guessed that I would be so much like my mom. In middle school, we do anything to not be like our parents. We don’t want people telling us that we are like our parents. How dare someone says that, I am my own person. But now that my generation is learning how to ‘adult’ there are things that we have picked up from our parents just by aimlessly watching them or from them teaching us how certain things should be done.

This is a list that I have gathered from different people, both men and women of differing ages, that have grown up to have similar habits like their parents. Whether we like it or not.

“It’s completely normal to sound and act like your parents, no matter how hard you have tried to be different. It doesn’t mean you have become them.” (Psychology Today)

Taking your hat off when you walk into a building

Most people don’t do this anymore but there are still some people, mostly men, who do this without even thinking about it anymore; it’s just habit now. This gentleman was taught this by his dad and grandpa.

Eat a spoon full of sugar to cure the hiccups

Well if this isn’t the biggest myth I have ever heard but people and their families swear by it. I guess it time for me to give it a try!

Back seat driving

My dad would probably agree with this… I am just as bad at back seat driving as my mom. Sorry mom and dad, I learned from you and I am sure many other people would say that’s where they have learned their back seat driving and road rage from too.

Loading the dishwasher

I’ll be honest, I have a specific way that I load the dishwasher and if the people I am living with don’t load it the way I am used to, I will rearrange it. Maybe it is a little bit OCD but Tupperware ALWAYS go on the top, knives do NOT go in the dishwasher at all, pots and pans don’t go in unless there is room and plates gets lined up in a row. One thing that has made college life sooo much easier, was getting a magnet that you can flip that says ‘clean’ on one side and ‘dirty’ on the other. No more wondering if the dishes are clean or not. Here is an Amazon link to buy one because they are game changers!

Underestimating time

Like when your mom tells you that something will take a couple of minutes, but it really turns into a couple of hours… *SIGH*

Ending phone calls the same way

Next time you hear your mom on the phone, listen to how she says goodbye. (Obviously it will be different depending on who she is talking to, but you’re not any different.) You might surprise yourself about how much you are starting to talk like her.

Deep clean your house weekly

Some people might deep clean their house weekly, others monthly, or maybe even never. Whichever one you do, that is probably how your parents did it.

Always check in with each other when traveling

My mom and I are constantly on the road. We let each other know when we are leaving our destination and when we arrive at the next destination. It is always a good check in for both of us. I highly recommend to this, if you don’t already.

Check your vehicle before a road trip

My roommate has made it a habit to check his oil, tires, gas, etc. before long road trips, which is especially practical in Montana when you can travel miles and miles before seeing another car or gas station.

Putting sheets and towels away

Put your clean sheets and towels away on the top when you are done washing them. But the real part of this plan is to pull from the bottom when you need to use them. This is for those that own more than one set of sheets and towels that is…

Feeling guilty if you have dessert first

Well this most definitely is not about me, but there are people who were taught a young age that they HAD to eat their dinner first before they were allowed to have dessert. I think most of the time my parents were just happy if I ate anything as a kid. Nonetheless, I think this is generally a good rule to follow so you don’t fill up on sweets before dinner even if the dessert looks better than the main course.

Keep everything possible in the freezer

We have always been taught to freeze things and then unthaw them if we want to eat it. Why waste food when you can freeze it and save it for later?

Do the dishes while you are cooking or right after you are done eating

This tends to be a little bit harder for some people to follow just because of the fast-paced life they live. My mom rarely leaves dishes in the sink after dinner. I try not to do this either but ya know… life. If I have learned anything, it’s that I need to be more like my grandma and mom in the sense of cleaning up right afterwards instead of procrastinating.

Always have a beer when you come home from work

I have lived with my roommate for the last two years and he never walks his dog before he has a beer. I asked where he got this idea from and immediately, he said his dad. I kind of second guessed him as we both laughed and then he looked back at me and said “YEP! Definitely my dad.” He claims it is the best way to end the work day.

These aren’t necessarily lessons but yet tendencies or propensities that we learned over the years while living with our parents. Most of these have become habits that we mindlessly do. These are the things that help us think about our past generations and what they were taught as young adults too. Once we take that step back and think about what weird things we do and ask our parents if they did those things, it is then that we realize who we got those routines from.

If I could be half the woman my mom is, I would be so fortunate and mostly because of the things she taught me when I was growing up. Something that I will never forget from her is every day she would tell my brother and I to be “kind, honest and respectful.” And to tell you the truth, I will probably repeat those same three words to my kids someday. 

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Say Thank You, It’s Important

I’m writing this blog for a marketing class I’m currently taking and I honestly could not come up with anything I wanted to write about, even after asking multiple people over the past week or so, the writer’s block prevailed.  As it came down to the wire, I thought “I should call my Dad, he always knows what to say.” And then it hit me, why not write about that? Why not talk about my parents? Weird way of getting there? Yes, maybe! But I realized that a shout out to my parents couldn’t possibly be a bad idea.

I’m not generally the most emotional person, or even the most sentimental, but I understand the importance of telling someone how much I love and appreciate them. With that being said, I realized that I really have never said thank you to my parents for shaping me into the woman I am today. So with that, here it goes!

Where to begin? My parents have never been the pushy or overbearing type. They’ve never forced sports or student council or even straight A’s, they simply planted the seeds and watched me do with them what I wanted. I still remember having discussions with my dad in elementary school about becoming class president in high school and how cool it would be to experience something like that. From that moment forward it wasn’t a question of if I wanted to become class president, it was an assumption and a goal. These little seeds were planted over the course of my childhood through casual conversations on the drives home from soccer practices, or nights sitting in my dad’s art studio chatting about politics and the art world. My parents were the best at just letting me be independent and make the decisions I felt were necessary to learn and grow.

Now that I’m away at college, these conversations aren’t quite as common and are definitely more adult in their nature, but they still have the same impact. I call my dad for literally anything school or professionally related. If I’m stressed, or overwhelmed, he always knows what to say to talk me down. He always knows what advice to give me when it comes to that job interview or when I have a breakdown about what I’m doing or where I’m going with my life. How he handles it? I’m not entirely sure! Especially considering I have 3 little sisters he also has to deal with at home. Regardless of how he manages, I can’t express enough how thankful I am to constantly have him there to guide me through life’s challenges.

As for my mom, she’s definitely a cool mom, more of a friend one might say! She’s always there like a mom should be, constantly the first one to ask how my day was and question me about the experiences I’m having at college. She encourages me to take time for myself and to make sure I’m sleeping and eating and all that jazz. She never tells me I’m being a child, even when I throw the occasional tantrum or have an attitude fit for a spoiled teenage girl. I call her when I need advice or guidance in my personal life, whether that’s boy drama or I’m feeling unappreciated and need someone to remind me that everything will be okay. She never fails to tell me how proud she is or to say she misses me and wants to know when I’m coming home. She always knows how to comfort me through my emotional ups and downs and lift me up when I’m feeling depressed from the heaviness of my responsibilities.

So Dad, thank you for always taking the time to advise me, to encourage me and to remind me that the chaos is only temporary. Thank you for constantly showing your support and never ending a conversation without an “I love you.” Thank you for talking with me like an adult and also for occasionally forgetting I’m actually a grown up. I know that’s just a dad thing to do, but it reminds me that even though I’m away at school and living on my own, you’ll always be there to protect me from the monsters in life. Thank you for showing me that sometimes it’s worth it to take risks in order to get the things you want in life. And ultimately, thank you for inspiring me through your hard work and dedication to your career and the obvious passion you have for what you do. And through everything, thank you for never failing to put Mom, me and the girls first.

And Mom, thank you for never doubting me and laughing at my relentless sarcastic comments, even when they’re really not that funny. Thanks for listening to my drama and pushing me to make the best decision and do right by the people around me. Thank you for showing me what it means to truly give your life to your family and your time to your children. Thanks for offering to drive to Missoula when I’m having a rough day and thank you for being positive through the difficult times in life. Thanks for never being afraid to express your feelings and reminding me that sometimes showing compassion and empathy are the best things anyone can do.

These are only a few of the aspects of my relationship with my parents that I’m happy to brag about. But really, thank you Mom and Dad. Thank you for creating balance and stability in my life. Thank you for never pushing, but always nudging me to succeed. Thank you for showing me that I’m really my own worst critic and to lighten up sometimes. Thank you for encouraging me to set my goals high and and my standards higher. Thank you for supporting me and inspiring me every day. I am so appreciative of every ride to practice, every long day spent at tournaments, the academic assemblies, late night phone calls, shopping trips, serious life discussions, gossip sessions, book suggestions, dinner dates, and a whole lot of patience.

I know I used the word “thank you” approximately 212 times and this really only pertains to my parents, but I think it’s important to take a moment every once in awhile to actually express your appreciation for the people who love and care most about you. I’m beyond grateful for the relationship I have with my parents and I’m blessed to have such wonderful role models in my life. Take the time to tell someone you love them, send them a text or leave a simple note, and never forget to say thank you because it’s important! I love you Mom and Dad, thanks for raising me to stand strong and be confident in who I am. I’m forever appreciative of everything you do for me.

Love,

Your Favorite Daughter

Jordyn Kronenberg

5 Reasons You Should Tell Your Parents You Love Them Today

Whether it’s your parents, grandparents, siblings, aunt/uncle, etc., everyone has that certain person or group of people that have been their largest influencing factor for the majority of their life. During our young  lives we rarely take the time to appreciate or even realize the things these people have done for us. Looking back one can realize they have done more for you then you could ever repay but with that being said these people don’t expect anything in return. What means the most to them is knowing the way you feel about them. So pick up your phone, write a card/email, or send a prayer today because here is 5 reasons (among 1000 other things) why you should tell your parents you love them today.

1.   They Gave Up Their Lives For You

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Once you became a part of their lives these people dedicated all their time, energy, and resources to you. They constantly sacrificed and forgot their own needs just so they could provide you with the things you needed and wanted. They went to work every day so they could provide for you. They traveled the town and globe to support you and your interests. They lost sleep, hair, and compromised the rest of their own youth so you could enjoy yours.

2.   They Built Your Foundation for Success

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Refer to yourself as a self-made individual and I have no problem calling BS to your face. Sure you may have worked incredibly hard and been dedicated to reach your goals and become successful but in no way was it a sole endeavor. The characteristics and traits that have led to your success came from the influence of these special people. They taught you how to be successful and once you set out to reach your goals, they were there to support you. They laid out the platform for you to be successful and this is a platform that will guide you for the rest of your life.

3.   They Loved You through Your Worst

spoiled-brat-kidRemember when you were a little middle school smart ass, a whiny little toddler, an irresponsible and unruly teenager? Well so do your parents. We all can look back on times and absolutely hate ourselves for the things we did and the way we acted but during these times our parents still loved and provided for us. The fact that anyone was willing to let us live, let alone love us during these times deserves all the praise you can give.

4.   They Changed For You

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Looking way back in time you may actually find a version of your parents you consider “cool”. They were probably similar to yourself now or a younger version of yourself with their own interests, ideals, and bad habits. Often times these are the hardest things to change in a person’s life. It takes a huge driving force to make big changes in a person but once again because of you, your parents often had to change and stop doing many of these things because they were not in your best interest. So indirectly you should be held responsible for your parents losing their “cool”.

5.   You Mean More to Them Than You Can Comprehend

I’m sure I will never fully understand what it means to be a parent until I reach that stage in my life. I can think back at the countless times my parents have gone out of their way just to get the chance to and sit down and talk with me and this gives the basic understanding that parents don’t care about the place, activity, or situation. All they care about is you. This unique type of love may not be found anywhere else.  There is nobody that have been as engaged in my life and devoted to me in the biggest and smallest ways as my parents. I fully regret every missed opportunity to spend time with my parents. With that being said it’s time for me to go make a phone call. You should do the same and don’t forget to tell the most influential people in your life how much you love and appreciate them!

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